Inferno
by mikaela prime
Summary: You're still his Wash. But i'm going to tear you apart, and put you back together. And then you'll be my Wash. Not his. Mine.
1. Chapter 1

Hi everyone. This is my first attempt at writing fic for Terra Nova, so please bear with me. I usually prefer to read fanfiction than to write it but this scenario has been preying on my mind since the finale. I'm really hoping that they bring Wash back. But first we need a second season, so for those of you on facebook please go and like the Terra Nova page and maybe leave a message of support. And for fans on twitter please go to the Fox twitter page and let them know we want a second season. While you're there why not drop a tweet to Jon Cassar and tell him we want Wash back alive and kicking butt!

She is on her knees, her hands chained to metal stakes in the floor. Her legs ache and her head feels like someone took a sledge hammer to it. Not surprising given the fact that she was still recovering from being shot in the head with a sonic pistol.

A sliver of sunlight shining through the tent opening is her only source of light. She has lost count of the days that have passed since she opened her eyes and found herself staring at Lucas Taylor's face.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. She was ready to die. Ready to find some peace, but it seems fate is still intent on torturing her. She doesn't know why Lucas didn't kill her, but then, madmen don't usually act in a way that can be explained. And Lucas Taylor is mad. She saw it in his eyes that night (his father's eyes). The thought brings a stabbing pain to her chest in the region of her heart.

Nathaniel... No! She can't think about him. Because if she does then part of her will hope that he is coming for her, and that is the last thing he should do. Better that he believes she is dead than risk his life trying to save her. She can cope with the knowledge that he is in Terra Nova, mourning but alive. But if he were to die... that is something that she couldn't bear.

Why was she still alive? Why? In that moment, when Lucas put the gun to her head, she was ready. She'd made her choice: her life for the lives of those who counted on her, those who were under her protection. Her only regret was not getting the chance to see Nathaniel one last time. To tell him all the things that had been burning inside her for more than a decade. But even the bitterness of that regret had faded in those last moments as she looked into eyes almost identical to those that belonged to the man she loved.

Granted, they had been full of madness and rage instead of intelligence and compassion, but she had still felt some measure of peace before darkness had enveloped her. But that peace had soon been snatched away by the paralysing pain that had coursed through her body once consciousness had returned. At first she had thought she was in Hell, but then voices had penetrated through the fog clouding her mind.

"Why did you do this? What was the point of pretending to kill her and then bringing her with us?" A feminine voice that was very familiar. It took her a moment to find the name she was searching for. _Mira._

"There would've been no point in killing her. She is much more useful to us alive," a more masculine voice answers, a voice that sends a shiver of disgust down her spine_. Lucas_.

"What are you going to do with her?"

"I'm sure I'll figure out something." There is an edge of cruelty present in his voice when he says that, and she has no doubt that whatever days she has left will not be spent pleasantly. She slowly opens her eyes and he is there, staring down at her with a mixture of contempt and interest. Her last thought before she succumbed to the darkness again had been of _him_.

_Nathaniel._

Since then she has been waiting for Lucas to carry out whatever plans he has in that twisted mind of his, but he has been conspicuously absent. Her only contact has been with Mira and a team of medics from the Phoenix Group. The latter had pumped her full of painkillers and sedatives for what felt like weeks whilst her body healed as best it could, and the former had brought her food and a change of clothing. She has to admit that this is the best that she has ever been treated whilst in enemy hands, but that just makes her even more wary.

Lucas has no reason to treat her so well. She is (was) the right hand of the man that he hates most in the world. A reminder of a painful past, of everything that he loathes. He should want to kill her. He was up to something, but what? Before her thoughts can go any further she hears footsteps approaching the tent, and looks up just as Lucas Taylor enters. His eyes are glinting with hatred and something else. Something that makes her feel a hint of fear.

I apologise for my abysmal talent. Should I continue?

P.S. Was Wash shot with an actual gun or a sonic pistol? I watched the scene again and it looked like a sonic pistol but the sound was that of a gun.


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry for the long wait. I had the idea for this chapter in my head but lacked the inspiration to actually sit down and write it. I think that's something we've all been suffering from, if the lack of Taylor/Wash fics is anything to go by I think all Terra Nova fans are stuck in limbo at the moment whilst we wait to find out what FOX has decided. If they renew it (fingers crossed) I think that will kick start us back into gear.

There she is. His father's favourite lapdog. His precious Wash.

Lucas Taylor can't help the sneering thoughts that enter his mind as soon as he walks into the tent and sees Alicia Washington.

She still has a slightly battered appearance even after months of recovery, and the chains that encircle her wrists and keep her anchored to the ground don't make her look any better. And yet she still has an aura of power and dignity that grates against his nerves.

Her deep brown orbs lock onto his ice blue ones and he can see clearly the mistrust and contempt in her eyes. It sends a frisson of pleasure through him. To be able to evoke such strong feelings in her is empowering, no matter what those feelings are.

He walks up to her casually and strokes his fingers across her left temple.

"How's the head, lieutenant?"

She jerks away from his touch and grimaces, ignoring his question. He chuckles.

"I'm just trying to be nice Wash. There's no need to be rude."

Inwardly, she flinches at the use of her nickname, but outwardly she acts as if he hasn't spoken and instead says, "Why didn't you kill me?"

He looks at her steadily for a moment and then replies, "I did consider it as the soldiers were bringing you to me. Killing you would deliver such a blow to dear old Dad. I had his precious Terra Nova. You would've been the icing on the cake.

But then I realised that there would be no fun in that. Once you were dead I could never use you against him again, and hurting him once just isn't enough. I want him to suffer for the rest of his life."

His voice is completely emotionless and she struggles to reconcile the young boy she remembers from so many years ago with the man before her who speaks of hurting his father so casually.

"If you had already decided not to kill me, why did you make everyone believe that you did? Why didn't you just imprison me?" She already knows the answer, but she wants to hear him say it.

He smiles and it makes her stomach roll. "Because I knew _he_ was watching. I wanted him to believe you were dead, to believe that he had failed you just as he had failed my mother. Wanted him to see his oldest companion and dearest friend be executed by his own flesh and blood, and know that he was to blame.

I also knew that there was a chance, though very small, that he could regain control of the colony. If that were to happen, I would need an ace up my sleeve. And here you are."

He crouches until their eyes are level and once again lifts his hand, strokes her cheek.

"He believes you are dead, so he won't come looking for you. And that gives me time; time to figure out how to finish what I started. And more importantly, time to figure out what I'm going to do with you.

Maybe you can help me with that. Should I kill you now and leave your body at the gates? God that would gut him! To know that he had abandoned you once again, believing you dead whilst you had been alive and in my hands. To know that he could've saved you, but didn't.

Or maybe I'll torture you and deliver your broken body to him. So broken that you'll never recover. And every time he looks at you he'll remember how perfect you used to be and know that it was he who destroyed that perfection."

He doesn't smile at the horror that has crept into her gaze. Instead he runs his index finger across her lips and says almost absentmindedly, "No. No, that wouldn't do at all. It hurts so much more to have perfection right in front of you but out of your reach than to have it lost to you forever.

It would pain him to look at your beautiful face and know that the woman he knew, the woman he cared for, was gone. How would you feel about that Wash? You would be a vegetable. Your body unmarred but your mind completely gone.

I wonder; would he be compassionate enough to put you out of your misery? Or too selfish to let you go?"

Her brain screams in denial at the images that he paints with his poisonous words. She couldn't bear it if Nathaniel ever saw her like that. And Lucas knows it.

"Why, Lucas? Why are you so full of hate? Your father loves you so much." She has barely finished her sentence before he backhands her and she falls onto her side. Her head is ringing but she can still hear him.

"Love? Nathaniel Taylor doesn't understand love! He isn't capable of it! If he was he never would've let my mother die!"

He turns his back on her abruptly and storms out, leaving her lying on the ground, her entire body aching but her mind carrying only one thought.

_Nathaniel._

I have to admit I have no idea where this fic is heading. I'm just going with the flow.

I would like to apologise for how short the chapters are. My writing stamina still needs to be built up. I would also like to thank everyone for their reviews. I may not reply to all of them, but I both read and appreciate every single one.


	3. Chapter 3

Thought we'd check in on Terra Nova. There's going to be a long author's note at the end.

Jim Shannon was worried. Some people might say that this was nothing new, but this wasn't the average kind of worried. This was worried bordering on deeply concerned.

And the cause of Jim's worry? Commander Nathaniel Taylor.

The man who sought to secure humanities second chance appeared as he always had; strong and unshakeable. But Jim knew better. Underneath the hard exterior was a man who was barely holding himself together.

They had wrested Terra Nova from their enemies' grasp and had managed to rebuild it to its former glory, but it wasn't the same. There were too many faces missing, too many lives that would never be the same.

Jim's heart clenched at the thought of one of those faces.

A strikingly beautiful face that had belonged to a woman that was the epitome of strength and courage. A woman who had sacrificed herself to save his family.

_Wash._

It had been four months and her absence was still felt throughout the colony. There wasn't a day that went by that he didn't think of her and wonder if he could've done something, anything, to save her. And seeing Taylor everyday didn't help.

It wasn't enough that he had been betrayed by his own son, but added to that was the fact that said son had killed someone who had meant so much to him. Executed her in cold blood whilst he had been forced to stand by and do nothing.

Even worse was that they hadn't found her body, so they couldn't even give her a decent burial. They had searched the entirety of Terra Nova and every person, dead and alive, had been accounted for except for her.

Jim's stomach rolled and his hands shook with rage. It had been a crushing blow to not be able to find her, and the only conclusion they could reach was that the bastards had thrown her body outside the gates. He couldn't bear to think about what the local wildlife would've done to her.

That was the last straw for Taylor. He had closed himself off from everyone. He was still a formidable presence in the colony, always standing on the balcony of the command centre and watching over everything. But he rarely mingled with the people the way he used to.

Any light-heartedness that used to surround him was gone. He was a soldier, nothing more and nothing less. Elisabeth had been the first to notice. Everyone else had been struggling with their own shock and grief, looking to Taylor to be their rock, not seeing the change that had overtaken him. But Elisabeth, with her doctor's eyes, had seen and understood.

She had tried to speak with him, tried to get him to talk, but it was like going up against a brick wall. That's when she had turned to her husband.

"It's not healthy, Jim. He won't let himself grieve. He's shut everyone out. He barely eats and we both know he's not sleeping. If he keeps going like this I'm going to have to ban him from going OTG. He's going to get himself killed."

Jim looked at his wife with weary eyes. "I know Elisabeth, but what do you want me to do?"

"Talk to him!"

"And say what? I'm sorry that your son is a homicidal psychopath who hates your guts and murdered your friend, but hey! Shit happens!"

He could feel all the anger, the frustration of the last months building in him, getting ready to explode. Why? After everything that they had gone through to get a second chance why did life have to throw this at them?

Elisabeth placed a gentle hand on his arm. "I know it's hard. I miss her too. We owe her so much, which is why we need to put our own anger and grief aside and help the Commander. We can't let him go on like this. If Wash were here she would say the same thing."

Jim closed his eyes, trying to hold the tears at bay. When he opened them again there was such sadness there that it broke Elisabeth's heart.

"If Wash were here this wouldn't be happening."

Sorry about this but I have been going over this in my mind and it's driving me crazy!

The finale just aired in Australia (I cheated and watched it online) and my Dad saw it. He enjoyed it but he didn't understand why they killed Wash. I told him the theory of her still being alive and he said it was possible, and I was glad to hear that it wasn't only us Wash fans that couldn't see any reason for her death. It got me thinking (dangerous, I know).

Simone said on Twitter that she doesn't know why they killed Wash. If Wash is really dead (God, I hope not!) then the writers must've had a reason so why wouldn't they tell her? I mean, you usually have to have a reason for killing off any character, especially such a great one. And you usually tell the actor/actress (why wouldn't you?).

The only explanation I can come up with is that Wash isn't dead. Simone can't tell us that so she says she doesn't know. Some people on FB seem to accept that she is dead but no matter how hard I try I can't because I can't think of a single reason why they would've gotten rid of her. I'm surprised that fans on Twitter haven't asked Paul Grellong and Jose Molina (the writers) why they killed Wash. I would be very interested in what they had to say.

What do you guys think? Am I making any sense or have I actually been driven mad by a tv show?


End file.
